Sunday, March 21, 2010

The Pitch and Bitch Conference

This past week I had the pleasure of attending the NY Pitch and Shop writers conference . It was an intense four days of crafting the perfect pitch and trying it out on visiting Editors.

On the first day we were broken into groups by genre. My group was lead by Susan Breen, author of The Fiction Class . Susan worked with us tirelessly to smash our full novels into a concise 150 word marketing pitch. Susan was the perfect blend of kind, professional and intelligent. Her advice was spot-on and in the end we all walked away with better pitches.

I wrote 50 versions of a single paragraph
and still rewrote it the next day!

I will admit that I had reservations about paying for ANY conference, but I took a chance. All of my reservations are now gone and I would delightfully recommend the NY Pitch and Shop to any author with a completed manuscript who is looking to properly market themselves. I promise, Algonkian is not paying me to write this, but I will take any money they want to throw my way.

Many of us ate lunch on the steps of the Post Office and fate graced us with the best weather imaginable. The writers in my group were dynamic, supportive and intelligent. I know I will have lasting friendships with many of you!

People ask me, “Did you meet any interesting people?

I answer, “Plenty. Want to know what happened to them?

Well, since the conference, Amanda quit her job as a journalist to become the new babysitter for Toots, but was fired when her obsession with cyber-sex became out of control.

Our fearless leader McFearson was picked up by a major publishing house, but when they found he led a secret plot to embezzle millions from the self publishing industry, he was forced to move to Paris.

Rafael, realizing where his real talents lay, went on to become an exotic dancer, or was it Brad? No wait, I think his name was Johnny.

The raven, who was making rude jesters behind the editor’s back, was shipped off to a mental institution where he is scheduled to be released later this month as a polite blue bird, instructed only to sing songs from The Ramones and Led Zeppelin.

Emma, formerly a textile expert, is now the author of a successful blog called “But really, who doesn’t know a homosexual minister these days?”

Kip gave up his job as a composer to work on his pitch with the literary genius, Rose. But when Rose turned out to really be a bra-burning hippie, Kip escaped to bartending on the Jersey Shore.

And no one can forget the little old couple, seen swapping spit in the corner of the room. They went on to host their very own talk show entitled “Old People do IT too”. We are so proud of you!

I wish the best of luck to all of my new writer friends.

Get published or get me published!



  1. Very funny! Hey are you a writer? lol.

  2. I love it, Buffi. Now say it in 150 words and you've got a book deal.