Friday, February 11, 2011

Taming the Bully

CBSNewYork.com reports, “The Department of Education estimates as many as 160,000 children a day stay home from school because of the threat.”

There are all degrees of bullying and sometimes kids can even be bullied by adults. On her second week of First grade, I asked my daughter, “Why don’t you want to buy lunch at school anymore?”

She said, “’cause the Lunch Lady screams at me.”

Fighting back all instincts to race to school and kick some crotchety-ass, I said, “There’s only one thing we can do. Bake her cookies.”

We baked the cookies together and imagined why the Lunch Lady was so mean. Maybe she just had a hard life. Maybe she planned on retiring to Florida with her high school sweetheart, but he died before they ever made it out of New Jersey. Now she’s stuck making grilled-cheese sandwiches and mopping floors. Or maybe she just hates the way she looks in a hairnet. We don’t know her story.

My daughter packed the cookies into a brown lunch bag and wrote: To My Lunch Lady, Love Amanda.

She brought cookies to school and handed them over, reluctantly. The Lunch Lady didn’t even glance down. She screamed, “Move it!”

But when Amanda turned around to look at the beast she saw it.  It was so brief and subtle anyone else would have missed it completely. A wink and a smile. Lunch Lady never screamed at Amanda again.

Not only did my daughter tame the heart of the bologna-beast, she also learned a few life lessons:
  • Don't be the victim
  • You have more power than you think
  • Love is much stronger than hatred
  • Trust your Mommy
Not all bullies should be tamed. I teach my kids the first step is to tell someone.

Thanks for stopping by.
Please support me with your honesty.


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20 comments:

  1. I wanted to say thank you for stopping by my blog and commenting... I am now following and I look forward to reading more of your stuff.

    I have my weekend 6 in 1 blog hop going on right now... where you can link up your blog, twitter, facebook, networkedblog, blogfrog and giveaways. You should swing by!

    All the best,
    Kim

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  2. Thanks so much for stopping by Lucas's Journey w/SPD Super Mega Weekend Blog Hop :)

    I can't wait to read more of your book! I get the whole dysfunction thing! LOL

    Have a wonderful weekend and I can't wait to read more of your blog!

    Debbie @ LJWSPD
    http://lucasjourneyspd.blogspot.com

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  3. I am your newest follower! :) I would totaly buy your book and i like what you are standing up for!:)

    www.justcherishtoday.com

    please come follow me back so we can stay in touch! :)

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  4. Thaat was a great idea to bake her cookies. What a wonderful lesson you taught your daughter about not being a victim.

    Following back.
    http://www.honestgirlreviews.blogspot.com

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  5. Thanks for joining us for Spotlight Saturday. I hope you have a great weekend! I'm off to take your poll.

    Kel
    www.betweenthelines-kel.com

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  6. Loved reading the Lunch lady story.
    Happy Sunday! Spring is right around the corner!
    New Follower from the Hop.
    Freebies 4 Moms
    http://casinofreebies3.blogspot.com

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  7. That was a wonderful idea! I'm glad things worked out for your daughter. Your possibilities for her being so mean were so funny. : )

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  8. This fits exactly with my thoughts. We don't know what people are going through, so how can we judge? A little kindness goes a long way. Thanks for posting this! It made me smile. :)

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  9. I enjoyed reading this post. Wonderful examples of teaching your daughter about paradigm shifts.

    I'm a new follower from the Be One Fine Day blog hop.

    Stop by my (fairly new) blog if you have a moment.

    www.naptimeismytime.com

    Best,
    Emily

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  10. Brilliant post. I've written about bullying on my blog today, too. But of a slightly different kind - me being bullied by teachers, after my daughter was bullied by fellow pupils and they did nothing to help.

    CJ xx

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  11. I am stopping by from the Be One Fine Day blog hop! I LOVE your blog. I cannot wait to read more from you. This post is great.

    Karen @ http://barefootinportland.blogspot.com

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  12. Your books sounds great. Can't wait. New Follower from a hop. I would like to mention to you that I am a finalists in the CSN Stores Bathroom makeover contest. To be in the top 5, it requires validated votes Could you help, please?
    http://csn.pxspot.com/bailout.asp?uid=13345&aID=7596&v=detail&fID=100783

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  13. Laurie - I voted for you! Looks like you are kickin' a** on the votes. Best of luck
    -Buffi

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  14. What are your thoughts on the South Hadley issue where systematic persecution drove a 15yo kid to take her life.
    I don't understand why the teachers understand the power dynamic where it comes to them but for their charges, no.

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  15. Hi there! We are new followers from the Welcome Wednesdays hop. Your book sounds amazing and we are very excited to meet you (er..meet your blog). We are amateur writers so it's going to be fun to read up on your process of publishing and parenting. We'd love to have you follow back, if you're not too busy! wendy & lisa - earth2body sisters

    www.earth2body.net

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  16. P.S. We grabbed your button. That still seems a bit awkward to say! ha ha! Hope to see you soon.

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    Replies
    1. I tried so many times to post on your website, but keep getting an error about a code. There was no verification code to enter. Thanks for grabbing me - I grabbed you back. Let me know if you fix the site.
      Buffi

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